"As a new mom, I'm feeling completely overwhelmed after giving birth. Adjusting to this new role, sleepless nights, and trying to meet all the demands has me feeling emotionally drained." Does this sound like you? This is what a new mom recently told me when she came to see me, but it's a sentiment I hear over and over from my postpartum patients. The exhaustion is real! Getting up all night to feed a crying infant can leave a new mom feeling exhausted and overwhelmed. Many even feel defeated because they can't decipher the cry to find out what their new family member is needing. You are in the right place!!
First off, Congratulations on welcoming your bundle of joy! You are superwoman! I know you might not feel like it right now, but think of what you have already accomplished! You grew another life inside your body for the past nine months. You pushed something the size of a watermelon out your.....well, you know! You were there!!! I'm sure I don't have to remind you of that! You are able to sustain that life for the next several months with no outside food source.
First off, Congratulations on welcoming your bundle of joy! You are superwoman! I know you might not feel like it right now, but think of what you have already accomplished! You grew another life inside your body for the past nine months. You pushed something the size of a watermelon out your.....well, you know! You were there!!! I'm sure I don't have to remind you of that! You are able to sustain that life for the next several months with no outside food source.
Along with the immense joy and happiness, the postpartum period brings a lot of physical and emotional changes. It's essential to prioritize self-care and nurture your body and mind during this critical phase. In this step-by-step guide, we'll explore effective ways to support your well-being and recovery after childbirth.
Step #1 Sleep Whenever It's Possible
You’ll often hear people say “Sleep when baby sleeps” and while that is sound advice, I say to sleep whenever you can!! You can get incredible benefits from 15 to 20 minutes of napping improved alertness without feeling groggy or interfering with nighttime sleep. These 15 minute naps can help keep you going during the day and help you keep a bit of your sanity.
Step #2 Gentle Yoga
As your body heals, practice gentle yoga or meditation. Incorporating calming exercises to relax your mind and balance your emotions will help to:
As your body heals, practice gentle yoga or meditation. Incorporating calming exercises to relax your mind and balance your emotions will help to:
- Increase calmness.
- Decrease anxiety and depression.
- Reduce irritability and anger.
- Increased energy
As the body is returning to normal and the Relaxin hormone is beginning to diminish, gentle yoga will also help to heal the tissues and return them back to normal, especially in the abdomen and perineum areas as well as regain strength that may have been lost in these areas.
Step 3: Proper Nutrition
Opt for nutrient-rich foods including a variety of fruits, vegetables, whole grains, and lean proteins in your diet. Staying hydrated is going to be important, especially if you are breastfeeding so make sure you increase your water intake to roughly 120oz a day. It is also going to be important to support your body with multivitamins or supplements designed for postpartum support to help your body heal and support both you and a new baby.
Step 3: Physical Well-being
Seek professional guidance for postpartum exercises: Start with gentle exercises approved by your healthcare provider to strengthen your pelvic floor and core muscles. Your OB, a Physical Therapist or Pelvic Floor Therapist can guide you in this. Treat yourself to rejuvenating massages or try Young Living's lavender-infused massage oils to relax and nourish your body. Adding lavender oil to a sitz bath can help to calm and comfort any perineum discomfort. This can also help to soothe hemorrhoids or fissures if you have those from labor and help to lessen the irritation from any stitches.
Step 4: Don’t Be Afraid to Say NO
Give yourself permission to simply eat, sleep and care for yourself and your baby during this time. Don’t be afraid to turn down the requests for visitors or the urge to get out and go visit family. Enjoy these first few weeks and don’t be afraid to be selfish with them!
If friends and family insist on coming over and seeing you and the new baby, leverage them for help. Ask them to hold the baby while you get a 15 minute nap or to bring over a hot dinner with them so you don’t have to cook. Put them to work doing laundry or helping with older kids. This can often help you fight off some of the overwhelm you will likely feel in the first few weeks. Engage your community when needed!
Step 5: Emotional Support
Join support groups either online or locally and seek guidance from other mothers experiencing similar challenges. Trust me when I say that you are NOT alone! Be kind to yourself during these transitions and acknowledge the rollercoaster of emotions that come with postpartum. Don't lock them up inside. I remember there were several days as a new mom at age 21 where my husband would walk back in the house after work, I'd hand him our newborn son and go lock myself in the bathroom and cry on the floor. The emotions you are feeling are real and they are normal! Acknowledge them! Back then there was so much I didn't know. We didn't have the internet so there were days I felt totally alone. You don't have to feel that way today!!! Jump into our community atThe Empowered Family on Facebook.
Step 6: Seek Help When Needed
Don't be afraid to reach out for assistance. Don't hesitate to ask for help from family, friends, or professionals, especially during times of exhaustion or overwhelm. If you're experiencing any concerning symptoms or emotional distress, it's crucial to seek professional support. I've typically been one who doesn't ask for help until I've hit rock bottom so don't be like me!! Seek out help when needed! That's what it is there for. If you are already seeing a therapist, talk to them about what you are feeling, your emotions, your concerns, your fears. If you aren't seeing a therapist, reach out to your OB for assistance and share with them. They can either point you to a therapist or can help you in the office.
Step 7: Start Small with Routines
A mom recently told me "Finding a routine that works for me feels like a never-ending challenge." This mom was a get out and go mom. She was social and loved setting her own pace. Now she was being challenged to find new routines because they didn't coincide with what her baby's routine was presenting.
Start small. You probably won't be able to jump right back in to Girls Nights Out but it will come! For now, start a daily routine of when you will get your shower, or when you will get a yoga or workout session in. It may all change for awhile and instead of a 45 minute cardio routine, it may be strapping your new baby in a BabyBjorn or a Moby Wrap and going outside for a walk around the block. (For info on best infant carriers, check out this post by Today's Parent)
Step 8: Don't Fall Into the Comparison Trap
I had a mom once tell me that she felt inferior to the moms around her. She would see their pictures and it looked like they were having an amazing newborn experience. She saw pictures of a doting dad cuddled up on the coach with the baby snuggled tight on his chest (and to add to it, it seems these pictures are always of a super good looking dad with an amazing set of pecs....am I wrong???) and pictures of a mom standing in a beautiful nursery and talking about how she's already back to her pre-pregnancy weight 2 weeks after delivering her baby.
For my patient, her reality was that her husband worked very long hours as a police officer. Some nights she didn't know how late he would be home and she spent a lot of time worrying about if he would COME home that night. Her nursery was simple, with a hand me down crib and she mostly had the baby in bed with her instead of his own room because she was too tired to take him back to his bed after middle of the night feedings. She was several months postpartum and still struggling to lose the "mom bod" she acquired. Her stretch marks looked like a lion had attacked her stomach.
Remember that most people show only the best stuff online! But they likely had the same mesh underwear in the hospital that you did and were sitting on ice packs just like you! They likely have their moments of sadness as their hormones are shifting and their feelings of dread when the baby cries....AGAIN! Try to not have any set expectations about your journey because there is so much that is out of your control. This is about you, your baby and your journey in life together, not anyone else.
Nurturing your body and mind after childbirth is a journey that requires time and patience. By implementing just a practical steps, you can support your physical recovery, emotional well-being, and overall postpartum experience. Embrace the power of self-care and give yourself the love you need during this special phase of motherhood.
Take care of yourself, mama – you deserve it! To set up a FREE 30 minute consultation with me, please CLICK HERE.
I work with many postpartum moms in my daily practice and am here to help!
I work with many postpartum moms in my daily practice and am here to help!
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XOXO
Dr Kelly
Dr Kelly
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